Hudsonville

There are bridges over rivers
There are moments of collapse
There are drivers with their feet on the glass
You can kick but you can’t get out
There is history in the rooms of the house

After dinner
Do the dishes
Mother hums
The coffeemaker hisses on the stove
The steam a crescendo
The radio emergency bulletins and
Everywhere wind

You took the train down to Terra Haute, Indiana
Visit family, your childhood home
Give your mother her grandkid and father a kiss
Put your luggage in your bedroom in the kitchen sit
With your husband still up in Hudsonville
Until the weekend when his shift ends at the furniture mill
Running water for the dishes and the coffee on the stove
Heard a warning from the corner on the radio
And the glass starts to rattle in the window frames

So you went underground
Took the staircase down
To the cellar full of hunting equipment
Held your baby in your arms
Read the labels on mason jars
Try not to think about your husband in Michigan

Stay calm
Keep the radio loud
Take care
Wind howls
Father piles blankets in the corner by the furnace
Mother lights candles
It’s a miracle the baby doesn’t cry

Back home doing yard work outside
Husband being stubborn under dark skies
Saw the fence by the neighbor’s shed split
Saw the kitchen windows start to bend in

So you went down to the back steps then to the basement
There were bookshelf plans on the workbench
And a flashlight shining bright all night try not to think about your son and your wife
And the lightning that scattered the night sky
And the wind bursts that tore up the power lines
At the workbench in the basement
Where you sat and tried to wait out the night
You called for three straight days
Still with your family back home
Up in Hudsonville the worst of the storms touched ground
And the phone lines were down
Turn the radio up
There’s a woman who got thrown from her car into a barbed wire fence
She was 6-months pregnant
Both her and the baby lived
You tried but the line or…

I remember those nights
I couldn’t get through to you when quiet storms came rattled the window panes
Couldn’t keep a thing the same way when the storm blew in and the furniture rearranged
I can see lightning there and a funnel cloud
And her mother said “I swear I saw lightning in your eyes
When that call got through to the other side.”

Stay calm
Keep the radio loud
Stay down
There are bridges over rivers
Sirens in the distant
Wind howls
Keep down
Then
After dinner do the dishes
Mother hums
Wires snap
Metal gets twisted
There’s the rattle of the window glass
Bending in
Take the children down
Terra Haute
Coffee
Thanksgiving
Stay calm
Keep down
At the workbench
Stay
And the coffeemaker hisses
Stay calm
Keep down
Turn the radio
There are
There are moments of collapse

First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice

I knew it was far too late to walk out on the lake then
Halfway to the middle thawed I wasn’t doing all that great

Had I cut my hair short?
Had I grown my beard out long?
Had I gone to school or…?

Why do all my plans fall through?

There’s a leak in the basement
Stupid permanent estrangement
Casement windows need glazing
Hinges and arms need be replaced

All the way at the edge I said I think
That we should head back
What if now the ice cracked?
Think I felt it bend

We took opposite steps
Tried to even the stress
Picked a safe direction but
You never know the way the ice thins

Half-asleep in dreams where
Ceilings start collapsing
Free fall through the roof beams
Get startled back awake
Before you hit the pavement
Floor of the foundation
Water in the basement
Bodies in the lake

Don’t panic I could hear you saying as I fell through
Blackness complete down waiting till my feet touched ground

At the bottom they finally did
First reaction was this is it
Next thought was just stay calm kick up
And save your phone

Because I wanted to tell you
Because I thought you should know

Because I thought it might scare you
To see me under the ice
Make you remember you cared for me
What would you do if I died?
Would you fly out for my funeral?
Get too drunk at my wake? Would you make a scene then? Climb in and try to resuscitate me? I was on the ice and I was underwater I was getting pulled out, I was in my wet clothes Stumble on the walk back, someone stoked the fire at camp I was by the flames trying to get my body warm I was standing naked checking to see if my phone still worked I will cut my hair short Trust me, I will I will let my beard go Trust me, I will I will never tempt fate Not once, I swear I will never trust ice I will never trust a thing

First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice

Rooms of the House

La dispute